Today I'm driving to Grand Island. It is about fifty miles away from here and should take me about an hour drive time. This is the first time I've driven myself out of town in a very long time. I'm a little nervous but I know I'm going to be okay.
Car rides have been problems for me for the past several years. I get terrified and jumpy. It doesn't matter if I am driving or is someone else is driving. This only happens on longer trips since I am fine driving or riding in town.
For family trips, I've found that there are things I can do to help ease the anxiety. If I have Ativan, I take one at least an hour before we leave. I usually take another one as soon as I get into the car. I sit in the back seat and wear headphones with the music playing as loud as I can stand it. I also read or play games on my phone. Keeping me cool also helps a great deal since feeling too warm or hot is a trigger for me. Chewing gum or sucking on some hard candy is another good thing. By engaging so many of my senses simultaneously, my brain doesn't have time or energy...or at least not as much...to obsess about the fact that I'm in a car and could possibly die.
When I get the chance to drive, I feel a little better. It's a control issue. Not only do I have control over the vehicle, but the driver also has ultimate say on the music and the temperature in the vehicle.
I'm sure I will update soon about how this journey goes. I'm trying to be as confident as possible and not over-think it.
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