Recap, part 2

Left off with my move to Omaha in October 2014.  I moved in to the basement at my mom and step dad's house.  It was planned to be temporary but, to date, I'm still here.  It's not perfect but it works.  Since I've moved here, I've seen the kids about every three months or so.  We text and talk on the phone as well as email and FaceTime chat often.   But here's a loose timeline of some big events:

*October 2014:  I see two different band performances in Lincoln and get to spend time with K.

*December 1, 2014: I start a job, the first I've worked in over 10 years.

*December 2014: Kids come to Omaha for Christmas/Yule with me and my family.

*January 3, 2015: K has first attempt of taking her life.  Hospitalized.

*January 16, 2015:  Visit kids in Kearney.

*Late May 2015: K has suicidal thoughts but doesn't act on them.  Hospitalized.

*Early June 2015: Visit kids in Kearney.

*August 30, 2015: K has second attempt of taking her life.  Hospitalized

*September 2, 2015:  Divorce hearing.  Finalized roughly 60 days later.

*September 26, 2015: Visit kids in Kearney

*December 20, 2015:  Kids come to Omaha for Christmas/Yule with me and my family.

*January 12-13, 2016:  K loses her life when ex-husband's home destroyed by a fire.  He, his girlfriend (TB), and her son escape, unharmed.

*January 16, 2016:  We bury my 16 year old daughter.

*January 30, 2016:  Z leaves for a semester in Ireland.

So yeah...crazy shit and lots of changes.  The loss of K is still surreal and to raw to handle. I'm probably going to let this blog sit for a bit as I continue to handle her death.

Z and his general well-being are of utmost importance to me at this point.  I'm so worried about him and, even though I'm glad he went to Ireland to fulfill his dream, I worry that he's without his support network.  Mama Bear is definitely in overdrive lately and all I want to do is cuddle him close and protect him from anything and everything that could hurt him in any way.

I am also doing my best to take care of myself - mentally, physically, and emotionally.